Tag Archives: Rick Perry

“The Response” – of Lunatics

Frightening scenes from Rick Perry’s crazed religious jamboree taking place today deep in the heart of Texas…

1) Rabid anti-choice activists call on God to end abortions in America.

2) Feeling “surrounded by the forces of immorality,” Dr. James Dobson and his wife Shirley pray for a “miracle of Dunkirk” to save them from the evil, liberal Nazis.

More to come…

3) Mike Bickle, the batshit crazy head of the International House of Pancakes oops, Prayer (they both go by the acronym IHOP, which is a bit confusing) stridently rails against all things non-Jeebus related. Bickle is the “pastor” who believes that Oprah is a deceitful forerunner of the Anti-Christ (or, in the spirit of simultaneous translation, Oprah es un precursor engañosa de la Anti-Cristo).

4) Dobson prays for the next generation of financial donors. Vonette Bright (widow of deceased Campus Crusader Bill Bright) prays for Christianity to be reintroduced into a theocratic school system. Finally, a weeping “Student Mobilization” coordinator Laura Allred encourages young people to repent for… stuff and beg for forgiveness; vowing that the declining years of the oldsters they’ve heretofore failed to “esteem” will be just super! Presumably once their social security is “privatized”…

5) An assortment of crackpot religious nutters, hateful bigots, grifting swindlers and right-wing political hacks (not a mutually exclusive group, by any means) disingenuously pray for the “cloud of confusion and chaos” which they’ve sown through their cynical machinations and furious ignorance to be lifted from the blessed land of America.

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