BNTITW: Secret Service Ducklings

A couple of Secret Service officers stationed outside the White House give a family of ducklings a lift…

Maddow says that it’s “100 percent politics free” but I disagree. Obviously this proves the officers are liberals because had they been Republicans they would have just let the stranded mallards fend for themselves on the sidewalk rather than giving them a helping hand to make it over the fence. Kidding… sort of.

Winning By Stealth

Rachel Maddow (with the help of Doug Wead, a senior advisor to the Ron Paul campaign) describes how the wily old coot is attempting to exploit flaws in the present Republican caucus system to gather delegates to the GOP convention irrespective of how votes were actually cast in the caucus by people less than fanatical in support of their candidate.

As quirky, barely legal, and wholly anti-democratic as it may seem, I guess one can hardly fault the Ron Paul campaign from taking advantage of loopholes in the system that inadvertently enable crazed diehards to ultimately prevail as delegates.

Herman Cain Art Project?

I would love to subscribe to this amusing theory Rachel Maddow has been propounding of late to explain the otherwise perplexing Herman Cain campaign…

Unfortunately, I just can’t seem to reconcile myself with the notion that Cain is a brilliantly satirical performance art genius to the more stubbornly held belief that the man is a complete fucking idiot.

Cain 2012: Performance Art Project?

We should have known at Pokemon! Rachel Maddow is now convinced that Herman Cain’s campaign is nothing more than an elaborate performance art project. As far as offbeat theories to rationalize the otherwise inexplicable go, this hypothesis may have some merit…

However amusing as it would be to think that the Cain campaign is wickedly clever enough to be pranking the electorate with some satirical purpose in mind, I seriously doubt it to be the case. More convincing to me is the impression that Herman Cain and his team are quite genuinely stupid. Any Onion-like resemblance to facetious comedy are completely inadvertent.

Rick Perry v. 2.0

You may well have seen some or all of Rick Perry’s astounding speech last Friday to a conservative “family values” group in New Hampshire in which the Texas Governor goes a bit… well, crazy. If not, MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow recaps some of it here:

Unlike Maddow (and many others) who seemed to be completely baffled and/or utterly mortified by Perry’s performance, I found myself being thoroughly entertained by his comedy stylings. Not quite a “Bulworth” moment, but it was actually a refreshing change from the droning blah, blah, blah of hollow rhetoric and mind numbingly dull piffle delivered by politicians on the stump.

Will it be Perry’s fatal “Dean scream” moment as Maddow posits? I highly doubt it. In the wacky Gong Show that is the Republican primary race, this manic, goofball routine can only redound to Perry’s benefit. I just wonder if he can repeat it on a consistent basis…

Rachel Maddow on Letterman

Towards the end of the interview, after expressing utter dismay at the relentless barrage of criticism that’s levelled against Barack Obama, Dave asks: “I would like to know, how would we be better off, how would our lives be now if John McCain had won and he was the President? How would it be better?”

Unless you’re a hardened cynic who believes (not altogether unjustifiably, it has to be said) that, for various reasons, the occupant of the White House is largely an irrelevance these days, then Dave’s hypothetical is an interesting one to ponder…

Side Note: I just want to take a moment to thank Youtuber “MiniRtist” who posted this clip and who has been doing just yeoman work in recent months posting full-length excerpts from Keith Olbermann’s new iteration of “Countdown” on Current TV.

Dog on Santorum

Another doomed Repubican aspirant (a much more appropriate word than “hopeful” I think).

Speaking to a small group of supporters in Florida last week, Santorum said that throughout his political career he’s faced mighty obstacles and has soldiered on. To illustrate the point, he recounted the time he was campaigning for Congress in 1990 and had a rather unfortunate encounter with a lap dog…

“The next thing I know I have this warm sensation. And I immediately jump up and there on my tan pants, is a wet spot where you do not want a wet spot.”

Inspirational stuff.

Oh, and to save you the trouble of investigating what Maddow is slyly referring to in connection with Santorum’s problematic Google connection, it’s the definition that can be found here.

A Beautiful Scam

This isn’t the first time Rachel Maddow has whaled on Newt Gingrich for his shady and downrightly unscrupulous fundraising tactics, but it’s delightful to see her now putting them in the context of his latest sham flirtation with running for president.

If anyone on planet Earth thinks that Newt Gringrich would invest a rusty nickel of his hard-scammed money in running for president, they seriously need to have their head examined.

Which begs the question as to why the media (both left and right) continues to give any degree of credence whatsoever to the notion of viability with respect to this philandering blowhard’s potential candidacy in 2012, not to mention their penchant for extending an open door policy when it comes to appearing on their talk shows, thereby affording him the opportunity to freely discharge his pretentious doublespeak to unwitting viewers – some of whom may actually mistake Newt for a seriously thoughtful person, rather than the venal, self-serving sack of bullshit that he most demonstrably is.

OMG! We’re All Al Queda Now…

Based on the intrepid investigative efforts of Fox News and Liz Cheney’s tax-exempt “Keep America Scared Shitless Safe” political action committee, extreme radical liberal MSNBC TV host “Rachel Bin Maddow” exposes the pervasive activities of a nefarious terrorist sleeper cell that’s alleged to have infiltrated all aspects of the American government and mainstream media.

I suggest that Liz Cheney and her cardiac-challenged father, former shadow-President “Dick” Cheney be immediately transported to Gitmo and ruthlessly interrogated with “enhanced methods” of questioning (which are not torture!) until such time as they fully disclose every detail of exactly what they knew and precisely when they knew it regarding this latest terrorist conspiracy.

Code Red!!!

Alas, poor Rachel… She continues to be endlessly bemused and frustrated by the motley assortment of shamelessly dishonest, hypocritical fraudsters and morally bankrupt douchebags that presently constitute the Republican Party.

It’s nice to see the Dems (finally!) taking Dr. Howard Dean’s advice and employing reconciliation to get this bastardized healthcare bill enacted.