True Fact: After a hectic day of impersonating a human being on the campaign trail, zillionaire and would-be Republican front-runner Willard “Mitt” Romney likes nothing more than to chow down on a sugary bowl of cold breakfast cereal every night before hitting the sack. Why, that makes him just like… well, not many people, actually. But hey, nice try!
What other fascinating details of Mitt’s lifestyle as an ordinary humanoid visiting from planet Kolob will be revealed by his campaign team in the weeks and months to come? Stay tuned!