Relax. You can now safely ignore all of the kooky predictions and hapless guesswork of zany media pundits about how events will play out in 2012 because The Lord God Almighty has just spoken personally to Pat Robertson and revealed His cunning plans for the New Year…
Apparently, a “maximum amount of stress and peril” will be involved. Oh goody.
When quizzed by Pat in the form of 20 questions about the specific nature of His impending tribulation, “God” confirmed that it wouldn’t be a crippling electromagnetic pulse, nor would it be a blast of cosmic or solar radiation, nor would be the product of a Mayan “galaxy alignment” or nuclear strikes by rogue Axis regimes, not an earthquake or volcano… also not a massive power failure. In fact, the winner is… “an economic collapse.”
Sheesh. Bit of a letdown after all those hypothetical Darth Vader schemes, wouldn’t you say?