Advice for HarperCon Activists

The following information may be helpful in persuading recalcitrant voters that your leader is “Here for Canada”:

Take a knife with a locking blade and just stab the sidewall and push the blade in and out in a sawing motion. Hitting the sidewall makes the tire irreparable and there are few if any steel wires in the sidewalls (depending on the tire). You will get hurt if the blade closes on your fingers so use a lock blade or a knife that doesn’t fold. A stiff blade is best too… not a kitchen paring knife that is thin and will fold sideways on you.

Don’t worry about getting caught. Our flimsy liberal justice system will have you back in business in no time flat. So to speak.

By the way, thanks for not cutting the brake lines of Liberal supporters this time out! I think that definitely shows how much your team has matured in government over the last couple of years.



Filed under 2011 Canadian Election, Humour, Liberals, Right-Wing Haters, Wingnuts

28 responses to “Advice for HarperCon Activists

  1. ridenrain

    Brampton-West MP Andrew Kania’s sign crew member Rachpal Singh Grewal was convicted of stealing Conservative party signs.
    Without proof, this just sounds like some Liberals are slashing their own tires as an insurance scam.

  2. Lin

    I think this should be removed from this site. It is inflammatory and unfair.
    Why is it that Liberals are so good at pointing fingers without anything to back them up?

  3. In an election Lin, everyone is good at inflammatory and unfair statements then, we all complain about how unfair and inflammatory this current campaign is. Tomorrow, Joe Volpe gives advice on how to knock on doors and toss opposition flyers in a garbage can without missing one step. If you aint cheatin’ you aint tryin’.

  4. Tomm

    There are clearly circumstances where political choices, campaigning, and “persuasion” has gone too far. Now, I think the Liberal’s have their chips in this pot as well, but the issue is simpler than that.

    There is too much polarization. All the Canadian parties (including the Bloc and Greens) inhabit a narrow slice of possible government choice. We are really arguing over some things that are quite similar (e.g. I think all parties proclaim their support for… Israel, national defense, the UN, health care, social welfare, reasonable taxation, border security, etc. etc.).

    Some people are just getting too rabid and partisan, regardless of the stripe they pretend to be wearing.

  5. CWTF

    Well the talking boob at Sun basically said that she was embarrassed to be from the Liberal/NDP stronghold of Toronto and that she’s had vandalism on her car and to get over it… How nice…
    The smarminess of Conservatives goes beyond their deep rooted idiocy (an innate trait it would seem) to a pride to living in a seemingly alternate universe where it’s never their fault.

  6. CWTF

    Now Tomm, given that Harper is an instrument of divisiveness in Canada, I’d be feeling quite silly about the statement that you pronounce…

    Harpercons are the antithesis of my thinking (and I’m a tend to be libertarian). There has not been anything positive about the Harper regime.

  7. Tomm


    The people that slash tires are not part of anybody’s campaign. This isn’t some fascist state where people get coerced. Everybody has a secret ballot, and everybody respects the result.

    Hell, we almost had some sort of separation of the country because of a 50% plus one result in a referendum.

    Your views:
    “…The smarminess of Conservatives goes beyond their deep rooted idiocy (an innate trait it would seem)…Harper is an instrument of divisiveness in Canada…Harpercons…There has not been anything positive about the Harper regime.”

    …are meant to incite.

    I hope that the saloon you are using to round up your rabble has ran out of hard liquor. You’ve found your villain, now you’re just lookin for some dutch courage and a posse to organize a good old fashioned lynchin.

  8. Tomm


    Sorry this comment is a little off topic. But I’ve been looking at the Knight’s helmet and unicorn on the Manitoba’s Coat of Arms. Do you have any idea what the linkage is?

  9. No one thinks the douchebags responsible for the vandalism are cool. The NDP-voters who burnt cars and smashed bank windows during the G20 were no better……if they were in fact NDP voters. Vandals/anarchists/fucktards are idiots regardless of stripes. I don’t think insane partisanship is as much to blame as bad parenting and likely bad drugs are for this behaviour.
    On a different tangent, this Conbot has already voted for Peggy Nash in the hope of dethroning Gerard Kennedy from the seat he doesn’t deserve. Strong Tory minority with NDP opposition would suit me just fine.

  10. CWTF

    Tomm, Harpercons are just idiots because they live in their own echo chamber.
    They will talk about good governance, transparency and lowering taxes yet, have saddled Canada with its largest deficit, have been secretive about almost everything. Now how do you think that deficit will be paid off? The magic deficit fairy? The G20, as Grammins reminds me, is just another example of Con wastefulness. If anything the excesses from an out of control police force to the malignant politicians showed abuses that should never of happened. Add the graft (Hello Tony) and the picture just shows the poor management skills of the Harpercon ideologues. Tomm, my views have been cemented by the actions of Harpercons and I find it difficult to understand how anyone with a semblance of cognitive skill would vote for Harper given the hypocrisy that he has demonstrated.

  11. CWTF

    Oh and Tomm, I see you haven’t addressed the divisiveness in this country caused by American style politics espoused by Harper.

  12. But I’ve been looking at the Knight’s helmet and unicorn on the Manitoba’s Coat of Arms. Do you have any idea what the linkage is?

    Helmets just give rank or status. That’s the Scottish Unicorn. No Idea what the horse is.

  13. tofkw

    Lin wrote:
    I think this should be removed from this site. It is inflammatory and unfair. Why is it that Liberals are so good at pointing fingers without anything to back them up?

    Lin, I have not read any stories where Harper’s supporters had their tires slashed, giant C’s key-scratched on their automobiles, or worst of all – brakelines cut. I don’t know about how Liberal supporters see this but I can’t imagine militant Dippers or Greens being behind this, because as partisan as they might be I just don’t think they hate the Liberal Party like that.

    And as usual, the Harper-Conservatives are the victims here, huh Lin? Perhaps you can contain your own partisan tendencies a bit, and try to work on getting the asshole-contingency within the CPofC to settle down.

    You can learn a little from people like Tomm. We may disagree on a lot of political issues or even what it means to be a Tory, but he is spot-on here.

    Also, Grammins – I highly doubt the douchebags who burnt police cruisers and trashed bank windows were NDP supporters – or any mainstream party for that matter. These are criminals conveniently wrapping themselves in anarchist flags in order to delude themselves into believing they are somehow political prisoners; and they are attracted to these G-8/G-20 events like flies to a shit-wagon.

  14. Gee. Tomm’s appeal for an end to toxic polarisation was really sweet. Then we got:

    …the NDP-voters who burnt cars and smashed bank windows…

    Pathetic. Should Harper ever orchestrate the burning of Parliament and the consequent suspension of habeas corpus, the drooling Grammins of the nation will surely not doubt the guilt of whatever dull-witted “socialist” kid the CPC fingers as the incendiary after planting some kerosene-drenched rags on him.

    Then we have Tomm, a “conservative”, wondering what the helm and unicorn on a Commonwealth coat of arms mean. Do modern Canadian “conservatives” actively resist learning anything about the cultural traditions of the nation to which they claim to be so attached? Would any of them manage to pass the citizenship test we administer to immigrants, or would they be defeated, like Napoleon, by the elements, and walk away demoralised after drawing blanks on questions like, “What language is the word ‘Canada’ derived from”?

    So, shall we tell him why there’s a beaver in the coat, and why there’s a weird-looking leaf on our flag (and why it’s red), or would that deprive him of the joy of independent discovery?

  15. The whole point of my saying that they were NDP voters who smashed windows was that it is just as absurd as laying blanket indictments against Cons for the actions of a few anonymous, juvenile dildos, which was evident by my disclaimer “if they were in fact NDP voters.” Morons, even if they do vote a certain way, exist everywhere and support anyone with whom they perceive they share some common ideals with.
    As for the term “Conbot” it is quite rich coming from Liberals who for generations have enjoyed support from mindless voting blocks in Italian and Portuguese communities of Toronto, sending countless silent, empty-suited backbenchers to Ottawa who collectively achieved zilch for those communities they represent. Now the zombie votes in the 905 are headed the Cons’ way and they are perceived as robots. Just a tad ironic…..

  16. “It’s garbage day today and I’m sure when I get home there will be garbage spread all around my neighborhood. Probably was crows or raccoons but I’m blaming the Conservatives.” Lol.
    No wonder no one believes the Liberal policy on crime.

  17. Probably was crows or raccoons…

    …or Mike Duffy looking for empty Timbit boxes to lick.

  18. Tomm

    Sir Francis,

    It’s a frickin UNICORN! This isn’t a stuke of wheat or a beaver.

  19. CWTF

    “No officer, I don’t beat my wife, she just ran into my fist” would sound plausible to Cons it would seem….

  20. Tomm:

    I guess I just too hastily assumed that anyone whose capacity for fantasy is so surreal as to lead him to discern some redeeming value in Stephen Harper must not only be intimately familiar with what the unicorn symbolizes but would very likely have one tethered in his backyard.

  21. Rotterdam

    1984-York University Toronto
    I had a “Reagen-Bush” sticker on my vehicle.
    My grill was smashed in, and sticker defaced.

  22. Trainman

    Oh and Tomm, I see you haven’t addressed the divisiveness in this country caused by American style politics espoused by Harper.

    Oh and CWTF… maybe when you’ve provided a reasonable argument for why Harper has caused divisiveness in this country, then you can expect a rebuttal. Just because you say it’s so, doesn’t make it so.

    If you want some proof about causing divisiveness, how about Chretien and Martin, vilifying the province of Alberta as private health care demons in order to secure seats in ON and PQ during the 2000 election–now that is divisive.

    Harper has taxed income trusts (aimed squarely at AB), given Quebec increased international recognition and huge payout on the HST program. They signed up to give ON automakers loads of cash. Just to name a few of the things they’ve done to spread the wealth around the country. Most of it on AB’s dime mind you, but that’s okay. To suggest that the Harper Conservatives are divisive is pure conjecture.

    If you don’t like dumb-ass punks vandalizing your cars and homes, then elect a conservative government that will actually entrench some justice in our justice/legal system and discourage these activities.

  23. CWTF

    So Rotterdam, are you stating that the violence in Canada was targeted against all those that don’t support Harper (as they are the only victims)?

  24. My grill was smashed in, and sticker defaced…

    …by an American student who happened also to be a militant Democrat. What a shame.

    Isn’t it terrible when foreigners bring their domestic disputes to Canada?

  25. HarryB

    Funny how you blame the Conservatives, but as I recall, Liberals are the only ones so far who have been proven to steal/and or vandalize in this election. A Liberal volunteer was charged last week with stealing election signs, and today we have the Joe Volpe story.

  26. What Canadian with any sense of decency, honour, and loyalty flies a Reagan-Bush Banner in 1984? Or a Mondale-Ferraro one ?

    WTF ?

  27. Chill out, Lin. This was intended to be humorous. You evidently didn’t notice that it was tagged as such.

    There will always be fanatical loons on all sides that do “bad things” obviously not sanctioned by the party to which they claim allegiance.

    I’ve seen a lot of hateful rhetoric over the years as a blogger. Vile insults, malicious slander, and even more than a few death threats… it all kind of goes with the territory. I don’t doubt that it cuts both ways in terms of my right-wing counterparts being likewise threatened, bullied and harassed by misguided fanatics or fringe crackpots.

    So I was just having a bit of fun at their expense.

  28. trainman

    Chill out, Lin. This was intended to be humorous. You evidently didn’t notice that it was tagged as such.

    Can you say backpedal? : )

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